It had been a wonderful morning with the first rains of a season. The city looked clean and fresh, the rains surely did what the municipal guys could not. I picked up the cup of coffee and just when I was about to take my first sip, the bell rang. I had heard the saying, “There is many a slip between the cup and the lip” but never realized that my day was just going to witness this in action.
I opened the door to see a brightly dressed middle aged woman standing with a plate of sweets. She introduced herself as our new neighbour. Her son had bought the flat and got her to stay with him. My mom jumped in front of me as if she had teleported there. In her usual, over flowing enthusiasm she welcomed her and I knew my coffee will have to wait. Looking at the lady, I imagined some savouries is what my mother would ask me to get. However, the lady managed to put even my mother’s enthusiasm to shame. She had already prepared sweet meats, pakoras, and lassi and kept ready in her house. All I had to do was to pick it from there and get it. When I actually saw the spread on the tray, I instantly knew the secret of our neighbour’s  wonderful ball like round shape.
As I kept the tray in our drawing room, bang came the dart of questions from our dear neighbour, something I wouldn’t really call humorous but did make me smile. By now I had realized she had a distinctly non-urban accent in her speech. She asked about all the gadgets and appliances in the house, what they were and how to operate them. She pointed at the monalisa reprint as asked if it was actually a portrait of my mother. Her move from the drawing room to the bathroom was as abrupt as her questions, as if she was waiting to go there. When she saw the washing machine, she exclaimed that how can we use it for storing rice and wheat for the family. She had equated it to a granary usually seen in a rural household. All this while, my mother very patiently explained to her all the appliances and how they are operated and I was standing next to her as an obedient son, filling in wherever she missed a point. The killer question came when she hesitantly pointed towards the western commode and asked how to use it? I could see my mother turn pink and then came a reply which had thousand interpretations. Before I could warn her and answer it myself came her reply. She simply said, “You sit on it like we usually do and do it. Once done, you flush it”. The lady’s face was expressionless and I could see a big question mark on her face. She was for the first time quiet for a few seconds and looked puzzled. She nodded her head and immediately took leave. Mother and I exchanged a baffled look.
I went to the kitchen to brew some fresh coffee for myself. While waiting for my precious cuppa, my mother and me were discussing about our new neighbour. I noticed how my mother suddenly felt a wave of a matronly feeling towards this poor little soul who knew nothing in this big bad city. Instantly I knew, my mother has found her engagement for the next few weeks and felt relieved that she would not trouble me with her questions about my marriage. My coffee was ready and I went to the balcony; I felt the cool morning breeze on my face and picked the cup  ready to take the sipping dip.
This time it was not the bell but a loud noise that gave me a shock. There went the cup back to the saucer and I went running towards the door. By the time I reached the door, I found my mother banging the neighbour’s door. There was no response for almost five to ten minutes. Just when we were planning to call some more people, the door opened and there stood the lady, partially drenched and with a pallid look on her face. She moved aside and ushered us in. I noticed a significant limp in her movement. She motioned my mother to follow her towards the bathroom and I traced her path, though a few steps behind her.
When my mother entered the bathroom, I could only see her face. Her reactions were changing, from that of horror to amusement and soon a smile appeared on her face. I could see that she was trying very hard to control her laughter and slowly accompanied the lady to her bedroom.
I stepped inside to see what made my mother smile.
It was a puny little commode that was broken from the side. I could only imagine my neighbour squatting on it rather than sitting.
Even luxury can be troublesome if we are not accustomed to it :-)