‘It’s okay Rehan, you can let me go now, I forgive you’; and a smile formed on her lips. Her smile was divine, soothing for my pain stricken soul; it brought my pacing mind to a halt.

‘But how could I ever leave you, Shruti? I want to go with you wherever you are going. I want to spend my life with you,’ and a tear formed at the corner of my eye threatening to escape.
‘Who said I will be leaving you madcap; I will always be there in those dreamy eyes of yours, and somehow I will find a place to stay in your beautiful heart. You will hardly miss me’.
Her petite hands started receding from my hold, defying my grip.
‘It’s time for me to go now. As much as I want to stay, I can’t see you destroying your own life, you need to get past me’. She placed her hands on my chest and said, ‘Now that I am not around, take good care of yourself’ and gave me a soft kiss before retreating backwards.

I lunged forward to hold her in my arms, to stop her from going, but I couldn’t. I felt delirious; a bright light enveloped my vision. I could faintly see her moving into nothingness, marching towards oblivion. She stopped for one last time and looked back to say, ‘I will love you always’ and a drop of tear or two was left behind sparkling in mid-air before she vanished into thin air.

I shrieked her name in stark horror, wanting to not let her go; when I realized I was awake and sitting on my bed sweating profusely. All her memories snapped the air out of my lungs and hit me hard. I realized what I had lost, tears now flooding my eyes and wetting on my hands.

‘Are you okay?’ asked my mom hugging me tightly. She kissed my forehead lightly and wiped away my tears. ‘Another dream of her?’ she asked. I nodded with a glint of guilt in my eyes. ‘I am sorry, I woke you again’, my head hung down. ‘It’s okay, don’t you worry about me, but these dreams have become too often and too extreme, it’s okay to talk to somebody about it.’ ‘Yes, I will’ I replied and ‘I am fine now, you can go back to sleep’.
‘You sure?’ she asked.
‘Yes mom’.

She hugged me again and left the room.

I lay on the bed fiddling with the blue sapphire ring that adorned my finger, guessing if that was really the last beautiful nightmare I had of her.
‘I will take care of myself, Shruti’; I promised myself in the back of my head and drifted off to sleep.

***

58 messages and still counting, this periodically vibrating maniac was turning out to be a nuisance. ‘Will you ever let me sleep?’ I cried in exasperation, and hit the switch off button. Just as I shut my eyes off, a knock on the door woke me up. ‘Guess I won’t get any sleep now; huh... time to wake up’. I reluctantly tried to lift my sleep-deprived body from under the blanket and sat on the bed, cross legged. Mom entered the room; a cheerful smile covered her face, with raw sunlight giving her a blissful panache and her serene eyes sparkling with joy. In contrast to her liveliness, I yawned in exhaustion.

‘Somebody did not sleep last night’ she said with a playful smirk and hugged me. ‘Happy birthday, Rehan’, ‘Thanks mom, I replied.

‘What are you hiding? Show me!’
She brought forward a small red box and handed it to me. ‘Open it’ she said. I popped it open and it revealed a beautiful gold pendant. Before I could ask anything she said ‘It’s not for you, you still have to wait for your present a little more. ‘It’s for Shruti, you are meeting her today right?’.

***

‘Who is Shruti?’ Abhi asked, Dia’s eyes reflecting similar curiosity.

It had been three months since my birthday; that night when life mercilessly snatched everything from me, leaving a huge empty space in my heart. It pained every day and time has only made it intense. However, my mother was right, it was now time for me to move on, and I needed to talk to someone. Perhaps letting out my feelings could do wonders when time couldn’t.
Abhi and Dia had been my best friends since 4th grade, we grew up together, unravelled all secrets together and stayed close. But I had lost touch somewhere down the lane. When I called them last night out of the blue, I could tell they were pretty shocked.

‘Hey, where are you lost man?’ Abhi snapped his finger which pulled me back from my trance. ‘And we need some serious answers, you know, we are not leaving you that easily, right Dia?’
‘And what’s with that ring, are you engaged?’ a hint of mockery in his tone. My gaze instantly fell upon that blue sapphire ring that carried me to an endless ocean of memories. Before he showered me again with a barrage of questions, I decided to continue.

***

I nodded, ‘Yes Mom’; a wide grin covered the width of my face. A mere mention of her name used to light up my life. Mom knew about Shruti and me; I was not used to hiding anything from her. She was more like a friend than a mother.

Shruti and I were in a relationship since last year, a long distance one. She lived in Nagpur, although the distance never took toll on us; thanks to the new realms of technology, our love thrived and survived.
 

Last night we had been talking for 8 hours straight, toggling between whatsapp and her sweet voice. Her voice never fails to mesmerize me, casting its spell on me and enchanting my soul. It had a tinge of childish innocence blended with maturity.

I still found it hard to come to terms with the fact that Shruti would be here in a few hours; excitement surged through my body.

‘Go on now, freshen up, I am preparing breakfast’ mom said ‘and make it fast’.

I took a shower, dressed up and headed downstairs. I heard mom was talking to someone, but a male voice left me dumbstruck. I trailed that disembodied voice and found myself standing outside the kitchen, staring at both of them, mouth agape.
‘Dad’, I shouted in utter shock and hugged him. He had been an aviator for 8 years now and because of his job we saw less of him. ‘So he is my surprise’, I asked mom and she smiled. ‘Well there’s more’ she said and my dad handed me a gift-wrapped box.
‘Man this is heavy’, I frowned. ‘What’s in this?’ I asked.
‘Well go on, open it’ dad prompted and I followed suit. ‘Wow!’ My eyes lit up like a firecracker, ‘Play station 4; this is my best birthday ever’ and I hugged both of them.
After finishing my breakfast, I ran straight up to my room, connected the Play station and the game was on! The blood pumping actions and the adrenaline stimulating sequences were just overwhelming. Time flew by on its golden wings, when a call from Shruti put a halt to my gaming marathon.
 

‘It’s already 4’. I received her call and her sweet magical voice lured me once again in its embrace. ‘I have landed, baby’ she said. ‘My uncle is going to pick me up from here, so I am meeting you in an hour’. I said ‘okay’ and I was about to disconnect the call when she said again ‘Hey I love you’ and kissed me over the phone. ‘I love you too’, I said and we disconnected the call.
It was 4.45 when I reached the coffee shop. The place was crowded to the brim with people of all ages and to put it politely, sizes. I went in and reserved a table for two. The waitress ushered me to my table. I waited patiently for Shruti to arrive, for the clock to strike 5.

***

I noticed Abhi and Dia were listening intently to me all along, sometimes their unwavering attention crept me out. I noticed the clock and it was half past two. ‘Let’s get something to eat first’ I said. Abhi immediately stood up and ran to the washroom. When he came out, he blurted out immediately somewhat embarrassed ‘I didn’t want to disturb you, that’s it’ to which Dia started laughing holding her stomach rolling on the bed. She was joined by Abhi too. But my lips could only spare a smile, a smile that lacked warmth, happiness; a smile that lacked life.

***

My heart was beating fast. I was nervous, I did not know why. Its thumping sound clearly audible and the door swayed open. What I saw in front of me, was a sight worth living for. My heart was basking in the warm pleasure of her unadulterated love, it was calming down. My mind was offering multitudes of directions to be acted upon, but they all went unheard. I was losing myself, drifting to a place, someplace beautiful, a place so magnificent, so wondrous, and so ethereal that my own existence was abandoning my spirit. My body felt numb while my eyes revelled in the expression of pure adoration on her face.

She wore an aqua blue faux crepe salwar kameez, not that she would not look beautiful in Jeans and all; but then again, there she was in front of me making my heart skip a beat every now and then, and I had no complaints. Her stole had an abstract design that fluttered in the wind making her look even more desirable.

I looked into her eyes and melted away in the ocean of blue; her sapphire eyes resembled the bottom of the ocean, mysterious and intriguing. A thin outline of kohl enhanced their depth, accentuating its beauty. Her pink lips curved to create the most enrapturing sight. Her hair hung open caressing her shoulders freely, thick as night itself, bordering her luminous face which sparkled like dew drops reflecting silvery, crystal and milkfish moonlight. She was a quintessential beauty.

While my heart took its time to sort out the emotions which were all haywire, she waved at me and I waved back. Everyone around us turned towards me. It would be wrong to say that I wasn’t enjoying the look of pure and unadulterated envy in everyone’s eyes, but the only thing that concerned me then was to cherish her love, to hold her in my arms. I wanted to hug her, to hold her close to my heart; her head resting on my chest so that she could hear the sound of my heart, only assuring her that I will always be there for her; to listen to my reverberating soul that resonated with warmth and affection of her embrace. I wanted her to know that I loved her beyond any imaginable extent.

‘But there are so many people around’ my mind whispered to my heart.
‘So what?’ my heart replied ‘There’s no harm in expressing love’.
 

A battle between the mind and heart is always won by the heart! I put my arms around Shruti who was now standing in front of me and pulled her into a hug, her fragile frame ensconced within my embrace. She wrapped her arms around my neck too and placed a soft peck on my cheek, thereafter rubbing the lip-gloss stain with her thumb. She knew how much I loved her doing that.

‘Everyone’s watching us, Rehan’ she said; to which I held her even more firmly just to make her realize that she was the only one who meant my world to me before letting her go.
She was blushing; her cheeks developed a reddish winter glow, a face so endearing and adorable... ‘What was that for?’ she asked.
‘Sweet nothings’, I said and smiled.

The waitress came to take our orders. Two iced cappuccinos; ‘One’ Shruti corrected, and ‘two straws please, that’s all’.
We were enjoying the cappuccino, often stealing glances of each other, smiling in between the sips, holding hands, talking, reminiscing, and smiling again. The ambience seemed emulsified by a sweet fragrance of love, cupids danced around in pure ecstasy and I started falling for Shruti all over again.

I sometimes wondered how I ended up with a girl like Shruti. She was way out of my league. Her beauty was unparalleled; her charming demeanour engendered an instantaneous spark of desire towards her; her heart radiated a blend of warmth and serenity that offered a surreal tranquillity to every soul around her; her boldness never failed to surprise me time and again. Whereas I was shy, quiet, an average looking guy, a nerd actually. I had always been kind of a best friend material for girls and I sucked in relationships, but whenever I found myself lost in her eyes her love for me outshone every glimmer of doubt I had within my heart. I instantly knew that we were only made for each other.

‘Are we going to sit here all night?’ she asked; my mind warped to the same dimension we existed in.
‘Alright, let’s go.’
‘Where are we going?’ she asked.
‘It’s a surprise for you’. I held her hand, paid at the counter and we walked out.
The clear blue sky was now replaced by sombre black, the moon was playing hide and seek and a few stars stood bravely amidst countless troops of clouds that adorned the mesmerizing sky.

Shruti was getting impatient. We were walking beneath the starry sky to the parking lot, hand in hand and she was constantly nudging me to tell her about the surprise. She loved surprises but the wait that comes with it irritated her. Shruti was surprisingly quiet in the car. Her feigned anger personified her cuteness like that of a child who irks the father for a toy. I pulled her cheeks lightly and said ‘Why are you upset baby? We will be there soon’. She jerked off my hand and glanced outside the window. ‘She can be too obstinate sometimes’ I thought.

It was around 8 when the car came to a halt. I held her hand and said ‘look’.
She turned her head towards an ostentatious building; a vibe of majestic grandeur returned the restless sparkle of her eyes. A satisfying smile soothed her lips and I knew that she loved what she saw in front of her.

‘I have never been to the Taj’ Shruti said to me a few months back and I knew what had to be done on my upcoming birthday and it was a surprise for her since then.
She hugged me tightly and a tear rolled down her cheeks. ‘How do you always manage to fulfil my every desire?’ her vibrant blue eyes glistened due to the multi-coloured lights, and I could only stare at them feeling captivated, possessed and feeling loved. I wiped away her tears and said ‘Let’s go inside’.

I parked my car and we headed towards the palace that lay at the heart of Mumbai for more than over 10 decades now. Its sumptuous beauty was a feast for the eyes; a vast array of lights lit the entire place like the 4th of July. It was an enrapturing proposal of old age architecture with a hue of modernization. We stood before the colossal Taj Mahal Palace; awestruck and marvelling in its sheer beauty which seemed to concoct an ardent love for itself within our heart all over again.

‘I am sorry sir. Do you mind waiting for a while?’ maître d’ said to me apologetically.
Zodiac Grill was bustling with a sea of people around us. Shruti loved French cuisines and so I chose this place.
‘No problem’ I said.

I proceeded towards the lounge when I found Shruti’s mind impervious to everything that was happening around her. She danced around, explored her own new world; admiration and fascination dripping from her eyes. She was as happy as always and I was delighted to see her like that. I promised myself to be her reason for happiness till our world came to an end and left her alone for the time being, to enjoy this new addition in her memory timeline.

We were soon shown to our tables and food was served. I noticed a family of three sitting on the table adjoining us. They had a cute little daughter who seemed to enjoy the food that was kept in front of her; often playing with the cutlery. I had quite often fantasized about a family of my own too, a perfect world that included Shruti; a stream of reverie clouded my thoughts.
‘I want a daughter’ I blurted out, soon realizing my stupidity. Shruti chuckled, blushing and I felt quite embarrassed. She held my hand and said ‘There’s plenty of time for that. Let us enjoy what we have now’ and gave me a warm smile. Suddenly I remembered that red box mom had given me for Shruti. I took it out and placed it in front of her. Her happiness knew no bounds when she opened the box.

‘It’s beautiful’ she said; her eyes shimmering in its golden hue.
‘I would like you to put it around my neck for me’ she placed the pendant in my hand. I waltz around her back, placed the pendant around her neck and kissed her head in childish fondness.
‘It looks perfect’ I said, my heart rejoicing in her satisfaction. I thanked my mom and returned to my chair.

Just as I sat down, all the lights in the room went cold. A few of them flickered for a while but ultimately they too shut their eyes off. Wan moonlight struggled hard to illuminate the entire room. Everyone around us were reconciling to this sudden change when a thunderous roar pierced our ears, deafening us. The window panes shuddered and a few shattered into a million pieces. My mind was developing numerous possibilities as to what was happening around when a sudden shrug brought me back to the reality.
Shruti was holding my hand and her finger pointed to something. A raging flame, wet with vengeance was slowly engulfing the south wall of the Zodiac Grill. Cries of help reverberated in the entire space. People went berserk and so did the flame annihilating everything that obstructed its path. Chandeliers came crumbling down, shards of glass ricocheting in the air like bullets. Some men approached the doors but they were locked.
‘What was happening?’ I thought. ‘Why are the doors locked?’
Soon the reality kicked in, the moment of truth dawned upon every one of us. Silhouettes emerged from the flame. ‘Help had come’ people shouted in joy. But there was no help coming in through the doors tonight. They were not the saviours. They wore masks.

‘Why are they armed?’ Shruti asked me, fear lurking deep within her eyes. They were carrying guns, big guns. The monstrosity in their eyes matched with the brick-red flames that were effortlessly trying to bring the place down. Tears found its way out from Shruti’s eyes, she was scared. I was too. I hugged her when we heard a few rounds of bullets being shot in open air. The entire room went into a state of shock, everyone was befuddled. The gluttonous fire was growling which was the only noise which could be heard apart from our furiously beating hearts. One of the three masked men came forward, hauled a woman who was standing in front of her and pointed his gun at her temple. Her husband was pleading continuously to spare her life, he broke down, but all his words went unnoticed. A loud bang and the woman fell down lifeless in her own puddle of blood. The silence hanging in the air still echoed his begging but he couldn’t do anything more; he sat there motionless trying to comprehend what just happened. He moved to the place where his wife lay, murdered in cold blood, lifted her in his arms and started crying; anger and helplessness surging through his entire body. He wailed and convulsed in pain, abusing the one who shot his wife.

‘Shut the fuck up, you dumbass,’ the other masked man shouted and shot him in the head. The room fell silent once again, except for the scorching fire that had now found its way up to the ceiling and the wall that had started developing cracks owing to the immense heat.

‘We are dead either way’ I thought. I led Shruti behind a table that concealed us from the direct sight of those maniacs, but for how long was the real question. They were on a killing spree destroying all the lives that were left behind by the fire. Their heinous crimes were unfolding layer by layer. They started shooting people randomly; slaughtered men, women and even children without an ounce of mercy in their eyes. We were just prisoners waiting for our executioner to find us. Nobody said anything, nobody could do anything. We were all but mere hapless pawns in their cruel hands.

I looked into Shruti’s eyes; they were calm as if they had accepted their defeat. I messaged my dad. “Terrorists in Zodiac Grill, inform police’; then I took out its battery and threw them aside. I couldn’t take any risks when it concerned Shruti. If they found the cell phone with me, we would be dead right away. Shruti curled herself in my embrace, her face dug into my chest. I held her tightly feeling her warmth and love for maybe the last time possible. ‘I wouldn’t be able to live without her’ I thought. My head ached with all those ugly thoughts that crawled within it making me sick in my gut. I tried hard to push those thoughts aside, but considering the circumstances it was an impossible task to do.

A shrill scream attracted my notice towards itself. I looked around and noticed that same little girl; the one who was playing with her cutlery being held up by her throat by one of those soulless monsters and her mother was at his feet beseeching him to spare his daughter’s life. He kicked her mother away and threw her daughter tossing her like a rugged doll. Her head hit the corner of a table, blood oozing out from her wound and she passed into oblivion. The murderer’s blood thirst was still insatiable. He advanced towards her mother who was now wincing in pain, stood in front of her like a proud conqueror and hit her again in the same spot. A thick stream of blood gushed from her mouth and she cried in pain. It was outrageous. I stood up but Shruti held my hand. ‘Don’t leave me,’ she said. ‘I am scared, I can’t lose you’.

The ground shook beneath us. The inevitable was happening. The cracks were magnifying, the ceiling was tearing apart. Suddenly with a loud roar a huge part of the walls came down, bringing the other side of the ceiling down. It was a massacre. A number of people along with all the terrorists were crushed within it, losing their lives instantly. The other part of the roof was hanging in mid-air via reinforced steel rods used during construction but it could come down any moment now.

I helped Shruti to stand up and we were walking away from the walls. All those who were alive thought that their worst nightmare was over. The terrorists were killed, the fire was calming down but the night wasn’t over yet. The walls yet again made a fearsome howling noise and before we could turn around or run, the other part of the ceiling came crashing down.

A few moments later…

The dust was settling down. The starry sky and the cool breeze were calming things around. My puzzled head was contemplating about what had happened a few moments before. My vision was obscure and my heart was heavy.
‘Where is Shruti?’ I wondered. I was growing restless, I searched around as far as my sight would allow but I couldn’t find her. I was on the verge of breaking down.
‘Did I lose her?’
‘What will I do without her?’
‘Shruti’ I shouted, tears choking my voice. ‘Damn it, why can’t I move my body?’ My body was still under the shock.
‘Rehan’ a feeble voice made its way to my ears. ‘Shruti, where are you?’ I shouted.
The dust had settled, my eyes were regaining its vision. I saw a girl lying beneath boulders of rocks, her lower body was crushed and she was gasping for breaths. Her beautiful face was scarred; blood running along her cheeks and her lips seemed to say something. ‘Rehan’. My body froze, the horror struck me hard. The love of my life was lying in front of me, dying. The flood gates of memories opened, my mind relinquished its command over them and hundreds of visions started flashing in front of me, paralyzing me and making me numb. I mustered all the courage that was left within me and dragged my body to her. Blood was flowing out of her body at an alarming rate. I held her head up and kept it on my lap, stroking her hair which was entangled due to blood.
‘Everything will be all right’ I calmed her down. Tears were leaving my eyes and wetting her face.
‘Don’t cry, Rehan.’ Her voice was weak. She placed her hand on my cheeks and wiped the tears away. I held her hand tightly and asked, ‘Why did you push me away?’ She said nothing, only a smile formed on her lips. She took out the sapphire ring from her finger and slid it into mine.
‘I did not get you anything on your birthday, consider it a parting gift.’ She coughed, spewing blood.

‘Kiss me’ she asked ‘one last time’. The sparkle in her eyes was lost. Her soul was withering away; my world was suffocating and dying in my own hands. I cupped her face and our lips touched. It was beautiful, and her body went limp.

The stars were sparkling, the night was calm.

***

Dia and Abhi were being helpful, their presence pacified the torment of emotions I was going through but I knew it was ephemeral. I noticed her sapphire ring on my finger; it had a lot of memories intertwined within it. I held it close to my heart and whispered to it ‘I will live on Shruti, just for you.’