All through day and night

I’m at battlefield;

Irrigating the smiles for my motherland

With my life and blood.

All through day and night

I’m at battlefield;

Safeguarding the moments of peace for my motherland

With guns and rifles in my hands.

For this, I’m trained to be tough

But, I’m not heartless.

I do miss my home and my childhood.

I do miss my family and friends.

On all the occasions and festivals

I’m surrounded with brutality and revenge;

Seeing carcasses of innocents,

And hearing bombardment of bombs and dynamites.

It’s been years my life is the same

In all the four seasons.

I play Holi with blood,

And celebrate Diwali with weapons.

A part of me says,

I’m a murderer of innocence and killer of my own humanity.

But, at the same time,

I’m proud of serving my motherland.

All through day and night

I live with the guilt.

Sometimes it torments me,

Sometimes it makes me cry.

I’ve seen much, I’ve hurt many;

I’ve killed many, I’ve lost much.

Now, I’m tired, really tired.

Will I ever get the peace in my life before death comes to me

Or will peace remain beyond my girth?

Will I ever find life’s true meaning before death comes to me

Or will my life remain absurd?