Prema knew the responsibilities of the first-born child in a middleclass family. Her father being an Elementary school teacher and mother, a home maker, Prema could well foresee her future. Her parents after a gap of ten years had two more daughters and a son finally. The father with his meagre income was struggling to make both ends meet. He was wondering if he could ever give them all sufficient education for a job. At the most, he could educate Prema. But then she’d have to educate her siblings. He knew that Prema was a responsible child and good at studies. As she was nearing the end of her school studies, he called her, “Prema, you know our family’s financial situation. I can give you college education which entails the responsibility of educating your siblings. Is it all right with you?” she thought for a while. She knew her father’s inability to makeall his children graduates. She told him, “ Appa, I understand what you mean. If I finish college, I’ll definitely be able to help you in running the household and educate my siblings”.   What a huge responsibility it was!- she could well realise later on. She had to bury all her teenage dreams!

Prema went ahead with her college studies. She enjoyed her college life with always the thought of her responsibility behind her. Once she completed her graduation, she went ahead with B.Ed. She knew that would fetch her a far better income.

Her teacher’s life started with great aplomb. She enjoyed her profession and was gaining confidence every day. At home, things started looking up. Mother was able to add a few more healthier items to the menu. Children could get new outfits on their birthdays. Everything was fine but Prema could see that her father was steadily losing weight. “ Appa, I’ll take you to the hospital and get check up done”. “No Prema, I am feeling fine. Must be exhaustion and advancing age. Don’t worry about me. I am all right”. But she knew it wasn’t so. Whenever she brought up the subject, she got the same reply. She knew her father did not want to spend for his treatment.  It would certainly affect the family’s shoestring budget.

Children were growing up and were going ahead in their education. Father was nearing retirement. It was then calamity struck the household. One night he had a sudden heart attack and he died in his sleep. As he wished, not a single rupee was spent for his treatment. All of them wept bitterly for the father would not see the family come up. They consoled each other that their father could see them all progress in life  from above. The mother stood stoically and supported Prema in whatever way she could. Her neighbours placed orders with her for pickles. She managed to bring home some money through that. Also, she got a modest amount as widow’s pension from the government. 

Prema could give post graduate education to Sneha and made Mala, a B.Ed. graduate. Prema was conscious that her marriageable age was advancing very fast and soon it will lapse. Sneha who joined a nearby college as lecturer would take up the responsibility of educating the youngest brother Ramesh.  Even Mala could take it up for she joined the same school where Prema was working. But both of them had plans for their future chalked out. They found partners for themselves and asked their mother and Prema for consent. She conducted the marriages of her sisters in a fitting manner. 

Prema’s mother was feeling sorry for her. She told her, “ Child, as soon as Ramesh finishes his education and takes up a job, you get married. I cannot go to my grave in grief leaving you alone”. By then other responsibilities cropped up for Prema. The married sisters came one after the other for confinement. Prema had to take care of them and do all the traditional responsibilities . Ramesh finished his course and got a decent job. Prema thought  she might as well find a good partner for him and conduct his marriage too.

Once all the responsibilities got over , she thought of her mother’s advice.Her mother was happy for her. But Prema was nearing forty.  Both her sisters and brother thought it was odd she could think of marriage at her age. But God’s plan was otherwise. A widower’s proposal came. He lost his wife to cancer and had a thirteen-year-old daughter. Karthik was taking care of her for two years after his wife’s death. Once Shobha became a teenager he thought she may need a mother. Hence the proposal. Karthik told Prema, ” I am thinking of remarriage only for the sake of my daughter. So it would be better if you can stay at home and take care of the family”. She was shocked for she never thought of quitting her job. Of course she was eligible for voluntary retirement having served enough years for the same. Since she had many years of service ahead, she was hesitant to take a quick decision. After weighing the pros and cons , she decided for voluntary retirement . It was then she noticed a small lump near her breast. She told her mother about it and they lost no time in consulting a physician.  When the biopsy was taken it was found to their dismay that it was malignancy but very early stage. Prema told her mother “ We have to inform Karthik about it and call it a day.  I don’t want to spoil his life”. Her mother was extremely sad and felt sorry for Prema’s life.

Prema took courage in both her hands and told Karthik about it. She concluded that marriage was not destined for her. She couldn’t believe her ears when Karthik said “ Shobha and I know what it is to be with a cancer patient. You need not worry about it. Since yours is early stage cancer, I can give you the best treatment you need. And together we will fight the disease and win” she was too surprised for words. She felt she heard the song , “ So somewhere in my youth or childhood , I must have done something good “.  Indeed, she has!